Do you buy condoms for yourself? Have you ever gone to buy any
kind of contraception at the medical store? Have you ever bought
emergency contraceptive pills?
Well if your answer is yes, I am sure you are aware of the reactions of those around you at that time- the shopkeeper or the aunties and uncles around you look at you as if you are buying explosives to blast the nation. These people who do not even know us
get exquisite pleasure and contentment in getting on our nerves and make us feel embarrassed for doing the right thing, however thankfully once we are out of their proximity we feel relieved.
Now imagine if you have to visit a gynecologist for your check ups and for anything concerning your sexual health and wellbeing. Well, mustering up
the courage to go to the gynae and discuss your privacy in itself is a
task. We all wish that in such situations we can find a comfortable ,reliable and discreet environment to discuss the intricacies about our sexual and reproductive health.
Unfortunately, what we usually get is the exact opposite of it.
Women around the globe have come out to express their disgust and
anger against the slut-shaming and moral policing they have to face
during a doctor visit to discuss their sexual life or anything close to it.
The medical professionals who are deemed to provide us with physical, mental and even psychological assistance become the ones physically harassing, mentally draining and hard to bear individuals when they are dealing with sexually active women, capable of deciding for themselves.
From the casual comments on body shapes to the presence or lack of
pubic hair to the size of cervix to the hymen being broken or intact, to being pregnant as a single woman or having numerous sexual partners, women have been policed, harassed, humiliated and at worse assaulted by them.
Commenting upon somebody's personal choice has become so casual
even in a profession so delicate as medical.
Well it is quite known that our country is smitten with the honor and glory offered to doctors and treating them next to god for obvious reasons. However it has led to the lack of power equilibrium between patient and a doctor. The doctors having been “honored” and “glorified” feel free to drop their casual misogynistic comment here and there.
Sometimes a person’s family members rely on the doctors word of mouth than their own child.
Adding to that is the saddening state of women in our great country where the Goddess is prayed but the woman is abused. This only complicates the situation here.
Women having lack of entitlement on their self, their body and of course
their choices makes others feel entitled to them.
If its a single woman's abortion she is judged as having low morals; a woman with numerous sexual partners is a slut; a woman having/not having pubic hair is blinded/not blinded by pop culture; a woman owning her sexual need basically has loose parents.
What happens next?
Women end up feeling they have no authority on their body and their wants.
They get stigmatized and left tormented to deal with all such accusations. Women prefer to suffer in silence then being subjected to such embarrassments and violence at the hand of someone who is meant to take care of them.
Due to the fear of being judged or getting in some uncomfortable conversations patients prefer not to discuss their problems further leading to deteriorating health.
What's more disturbing is that women have witnessed such shaming via
male and female professionals. Filing complaints or raising a voice also goes in vain as no satisfactory actions get followed for the same.
It is shameful and sorrowful that a place/personnel who are supposed to
help you out, make the situation more awful. The ones who should be
easing out our nerves are getting on our nerves and what's more gloomy is the profession that is treated as Sacred is being profaned.
-Deepanshi
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